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Archive for April, 2009

Hall Of Fame…

April 7th, 2009

MJ will be inducted into the Naismith Basketball Hall of Fame in the class of 09… (Dude could fly) Is anyone shocked by this? Is this actually news? That’s like being surprised Denis Rodman is an alcoholic, Charlie Sheen has an IQ of seven, or that the only people hitting up Taco Bell’s late night […]

Twitter…

April 6th, 2009

To Twitter or not, that is the question… (“Shades” twitters! Be like “Shades”) I generally avoid things that rhyme with the words “bitter”, “quitter”, or “shitter”… That’s why I don’t purchase “Gritty kitty litter from a knitter baby sitter”… Twitter asks the user to type in 140 characters into a “tweet” to let people know […]

Turn to the master… (Where’s Cheney’s human sized safe?) The task is daunting, and “jump shot” will make mistakes no doubt. I’m guessing he pokes the chest of Pervez Musharraf after every word saying, “Listen up Perv! You best, get, your, shit, together, short stack”. I just hope his doesn’t go full on gray hair […]

Holy Balls!

April 3rd, 2009

Who’s the newest quarter back acquired by the Chicago Bears? Captain Cutler! (Cutler gets his revenge on Denver) We just got Denver Bronco’s superstar Jay Cutler! Who’s he you ask? He’s only one of the best accidental free agent quarter backs available in…forever… Someone might want to look under Jerry Angelo’s desk for empty modeling […]

Officer Fartface Resigns!

April 2nd, 2009

No, it’s not an April Fools joke one day late, it’s the real thing… (Self-preservation interview mode) “I made this decision in the hope that my resignation will allow the Dallas Police Department, my fellow officers, and the citizens of Dallas to better reflect on this experience, learn from the mistakes made, and move forward”… […]

We have footage of President Obama, when he was only 20 years old, in a basketball themed adult film called “Drain My Balls”… (He gets lei’ed by grandma) April Fools!!! Ohhhhhhh super burn! I totally got you guys… (Explains people didn’t actually buy it) Really? You sure? But it sounded so convincing… Guess I should’ve […]

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