Ok Obama haters. Finally you have a real screw up to enjoy You see? You didn’t have to create insane shit out of thin air for 2 years (Ahem, he did, twice) The other insanity like ACORN, Bill Ayers, Reverend Wright, Or that he’s a Kenyan born zombie from planet Zork was silly Especially when […]

Illinois Tea Party Republican Representative Joe Walsh Is now in hotter water over his unpaid child support (Wait, I owe you $ too?) Turns out, the judge also thinks so & ruled against him They said it’s all on him to prove he doesn’t owe the $ (Bravo, wait…what?) For a guy screaming “Fiscal Responsibility” […]

I’ve been dying to say that for a while And there hasn’t been much news about Anthony Weiner (The “junk” shot) Until they had a special election for his vacant congressional seat In a stunner, it was won by Republican Bob Turner (I only sext older women) The largely white working class district is 40% […]

The sickest part of last nights Republican Tea Party debate? (Spot the tokens) Wolf Blitzer, who sounds like either a powerful defensive end Or a guy shooting animals from a chopper from CNN asked: If a healthy 30 year old man doesn’t buy health insurance Doesn’t have it, but then gets very sick and needs […]

A Dutch woman called her ex-boyfriend 65,000 times Which means at least 20% of the calls were made on the toilet (Oh no) My guess is her job was as a telemarketer The worst part, the guy denied ever having a relationship with her Ouch, that’s not good at all. It’s a case of “Look […]

When I order on-line, & it comes to the “shipping” part I’m pissed they don’t offer a cool carrier Pigeon (Looking gooooood) Maybe one dressed in a fancy leather outfit Wearing a helmet with flames on the side (Avoid the propeller) Just sayin’… Master Debators Part Douche Rick Perry is now called “The Ponz” (Sit […]

Prime time pre-NFL football President tonight… (Where’d the coin toss go?) He’ll talk about jobs. Hand jobs, rim jobs, Steven jobs, blow jo… Wait, wrong kind. It’ll all be infrastructure galore with “let’s work together” I admire the guy. He keeps getting punched in the nuts (GOP makes borg babies) But thinks the rich prick […]

Hey, every circle needs a jerk… The Republican debates are on tonight Mitt Romney will do his best “dreamy dad” impression (I resemble that remark) While offering nothing but Obama-right-lite policies For the 1st time Rick “Dumber Bush” Perry is in them Make sure to listen closely as his insanity. It’ll sound 00-08 familiar (Let’s […]

Would make a great politician (Shaving accident) He wouldn’t take any shit from anyone who was crooked, and if you crossed him He’d bust your arm in 3 places, then your face, then your neck All brawn, no brains. Meh, it’s sort of like today’s Tea Party (Come again Tea Turds?) All yelling, no brains. […]

It’s just about the best thing in the entire world Oh, and don’t even get me started on the “dishes” or “laundry” (It’s off the charts) Screw watching sports, movies, napping, or playing video games I’m “all in” when it comes to watering plants, or ironing shit I think, “Damn, I’m gonna fucking clean that […]