My testicles just shot out of my pant leg…

(Well no shit)

No, I mean it’s cold. It’s so cold Pengiuns are

Outside smoking a cigarette saying, “Holy balls,

It’s too damn cold to even smoke”. That’s cold

9 isn’t a temperature, it’s the age of your niece

It’s “The Iowa Carcass’s”

You’ve seen the group of selectable GOP candidates?

It looks like one big group of lab testing rat rejects

(The elephant looks unstable)

Who are all trapped in the 1950’s socially, but in the

1980’s economically. The sad part, we’re in 2012

With policy realities they have no fucking clue about

(The crazy has landed)

They all look so very lost in their own party now

They can’t find a single candidate as moderate as

W. Bush was. Think about that for a brief moment

(Hi, I’m “dreamy boring”)

Bush was way far neo-con right, but now the GOP

Just picked up their tent stakes, & ran 520 miles

Farther right………off a cliff into the “Crazy Ocean”

(Average voter)

I’m calling it people. The time of death is 11:02am on

Tuesday January 3rd. The Republican party is gone

*Puts white sheet over the body laying on the ground*

(Awww no)

The good news? Towards the end, it became very clear

They really did like White Sheets covering them anyhow

Bad news, Democrats are still filthy pussies with no balls

Have a day!