Are you bound up?!?! Can’t poop?! Blue eyes now brown?! Well fret no more. I have an instant laxative recipe for you: (Don’t fart) half a bottle of scotch, White Castle sliders & Steven Seagal movies. You will be on the toilet within minutes, & shitting like a bloated cokedup donkey. Good times, goooood times […]

The father of sad slain victim Christopher Martinez said (“Do your jobs!”) this eye opening heartfelt statement the other day on TV “Don’t call me and tell me you are sorry about my son’s death. I don’t wanna hear it from you!!!!!! I don’t want to hear that you’re sorry about my son’s death I […]

Dallas Mavericks owner Mark Cuban is very eccentric He says what’s on his mind, & always flashes that grin (“Tanks” for nuthin) Well, he stated this ‘line’ the other day in an interview: “I know I’m prejudiced, and I know I’m bigoted in a lot of different ways. I think we’re all bigots and I […]

Hope you all had an awesome Memorial Day! You readers are political junkies thoughtful members of society & such (No boycott?!?) sharp, intelligent people. You know, the direct opposite of ‘most’ political people in office today. It is ALL way too sad So now let’s all play ‘Benghazi Bingo’. This is now our 12th hearing […]

When you think of Classic Violins, you think of fun music, talented players & orchestras, right? Wrong! (“Say what?!?!”) They should ‘all’ be used as tiny boat oars because I said so. They just work way better. Go head…..try it out. Get a ‘rare Stradivarius’ for 1 million, & go have some fun. Only problem […]

Republican Ted Yoho thinks only people with property (<bigot idiot) should be able to vote in America. My my how exciting! “I’ve had some radical ideas about voting and it is probably not a good time to tell them, but you used to have to be a property owner to vote” *The crowd of older […]

Elisabeth Hasselbeck knows parents. In fact, she knows everything, just ask her, & she will yell until all the color (Derp!) bars appear or the FOX signal is lost. But when it comes to “pot” she knows less than nothing. She had on former NFL linebacker for the Pats Shawn Stuckey to talk about the […]

10 to 30 million “Patriots” decided to march on DC this past weekend to “take back” their country. In fact, these (Crickets) are the ‘Cliven Bundy’ “Merica” & “Freedom” lovers who guaranteed a minimum of 10 million people would show up to this “Proud Patriotic Pissed-Off Fest”. Gee how did that go?!?!? According to Right […]

So, the governors race consisted of a cowboy, a curmudgeon, a biker & a “normal guy”. If by “normal”, you meant someone who isn’t clinically (“Commies!!!”) insane. I can’t write a sketch this funny. Republican reality is way more ‘goofy’. I give ya, the perfect preview for the Republican 2016 primaries One of my favorite […]

OK, what is the one thing you want to know all about? How to end world hunger? Obtain world peace?! Or is (jet pack!) it how to find those missing odd socks your drier eats? I’ll bet whatever you were thinking about it sure wasn’t “Jetpack Skydiving Porn”. Ohh, sorry Todd I guess you were […]