You can run for VP, but you can’t hide from your policy record. You can

“try”, but will fail badly. It’s really that simple. But now that Akin is the

(“That was me before“)

new poster boy for the “Vagina’s How Do They Work” plank in the GOP

Ryan’s running away from it faster than Usain Bolt after a gun goes off

See, he actually cosponsored two important bills that redefine rape with

wait for it, wait for it. Boom: Todd Akin. They cosponsored these 2 bills:

(who’s your policy buddy?)

Sanctity of Human Life Act(which gives embryo’s rights), & The No Tax

Payer Funding For Abortions Act. Paulie only supports abortion for the

life of the mother, not for incest or rape. That’s the exact stance of Todd

But after this shitstorm, it’s timey time to walk that crap back. Paul says

(“It’s the new me!”)

“Rape is rape”. When pressed because of this massive contradiction he

said: “Rape is rape and there’s no splitting hairs over rape”. Well NOW

there’s not. But you had no problems at all doing it in legislation before

Oh, and now what do you think of Todd Akin’s stance you agreed with?

“His statements were outrageous, over the pale”. Anything else to add?

(“Rape is rape…now”)

“I don’t know anybody who would agree with that”. Um, find a mirror

Translation: “It’s the general election, my views scare people senseless”

How do those tire marks feel Todd? Welcome to your life under the bus

Listen, this isn’t a “flub”, a “gaffe”, or “whoopsie”. This is a Republican

accidentally opening his trap telling you exactly what the party thinks,

(GOP humor)

then the GOP doing damage control pretending they don’t all think it

They’re scared you saw the real “them”. If your ideas are so strong &

principled, give them the light of day, & let the voters decide. But they

don’t think you will like it. So hide them until they win, & then do them

Oh, who’s sticking up for Akin now? Steve King is, and so is Joe Walsh

(“I’m a dick too”)

With friends like those, you might feel the fork in your ass, cause buddy

you’re done. We should be on jobs, & the economy but they won’t let us

Everything’s Bigger In Texas, Including The Fidiots

Tom Head, a county judge in Lubbock Texas was on TV a few days ago

(Tom’s on the right)

He was discussing what he thinks will happen if Obama was re-elected:

“He’s(Obama) going to hand over sovereignty over to the UN, & what is
going to happen when that happens? I’m thinking the worst. Civil unrest,
civil disobedience, civil war maybe…He’s(Obama) going to send in U.N.
troops. I don’t want ’em in Lubbock County…’you’re not coming in here'”

(“You fucking moron!”)

Holy shit. I have tears in my eyes. Literally my chest hurts from laughing

so hard. Then I realized something. This guy is a FUCKING JUDGE and

actually believes these batshitcrazy lies & insanity. He’s threatening sanity

This guy is what’s wrong with our country. If you want to be a moron, ok

(Middle name “Nothing’sin”)

It’s your call. But if you want to govern others thoughtfully, maybe they

shouldn’t be shit flinging clinically insane. It’s just a thought, just sayin’

I guess all of America’s problems started Jan 21, 2009. Which tells me 2

things: one, you’re only 3.75 years old; & two, you just hate the black guy

Either way, the world has moved on, now it’s just you stuck there, alone

Have a day!